30 of the most hilarious hockey puns to crack your ribs

30 of the most hilarious hockey puns to crack your ribs

Ciku Njuguna
updated at April 12, 2023 at 8:21 PM

Almost all hurley lovers, including coaches, commentators, players and fans, enjoy a chuckle over hockey puns. In addition to goals, scores, and trophies, sports play on words offer players and fans a healthy dose of humour.

Funny ice hockey captions
Calgary Flames' Milan Lucic (front) handles the puck against players of the Seattle Kraken at the Climate Pledge Arena in December 2022 in Seattle, Washington. Photo by Steph Chambers.
Source: Getty Images

As a recreational or professional sporting activity, running and skating in the game offers several health benefits to its players. However, it is said laughter is good for the soul. Here is a collection of the funniest field, ice, and air hockey puns.

Field hockey puns

  1. What do jocks use to tie the score? An extra set of shoelaces.
  2. What do a dentist and a coach have one thing in common? They both use drills.
  3. To avoid the label of the goalkeeper who let in the most goals, the frustrated goalie angrily looked at the puck and said, "I'll catch you later".
  4. When the local team faced the drop, the coach eagerly got a ghost sign-in to get many ghouls.
  5. After the third period of the game, the player was arrested by the police. Later, the police revealed that he was seriously charged with shooting the ball.
  6. All players enjoy a special drink during a match and only when their team gets a chance to score from the opponent's box. That drink is a penal-tea!
  7. An agent will simply quote you a ballpark estimate to buy a stadium.
  8. A jock visits a bank after every game only because he wants to give out more and more checks!
  9. What is the favourite position of play for a ghost in the field hockey team? The Ghouli.
  10. What is the name of the seniors' team? The Jerry Hat Tricks!
Field hockey puns for captions
Austria's Tschurnig (front) runs after the puck against Germany during the 2023 IIHF World Junior Championship at Scotiabank Centre in December 2022 in Halifax, Canada. Photo by Minas Panagiotakis.
Source: Getty Images

Air hockey jokes

  1. If Lays had invented air hockey. It would be just air.

Ice hockey puns

The fast pace, epic hits and endless action-packed in a hockey game make it one of the most thrilling games to watch with family and friends. The passionate skating, zooming and unexpected brawls and fights offer only part of the game's entertainment value. The best hockey puns and jokes, such as why hockey players are similar to goldfish, bring spectators closer to each game.

What are some funny hockey phrases?
Austria's Tschurnig (front) skates after the puck against Germany during the 2023 IIHF World Junior Championship at Scotiabank Centre in December 2022 in Halifax, Canada. Photo by Minas Panagiotakis.
Source: Getty Images
  1. When the local Winnipeg, Manitoba club hired a moose to coach the local team, they did not expect impressive results so quickly. To honour the moose, now the club is called the Manitoba moose!
  2. When the Philadelphia Flyers team needed reinforcements in their defence, the agent excitedly said, "Oduya?"
  3. Ice hockey is one of the top contenders in international sports awards. It is the coolest sport, among others!
  4. Although we wanted to go to a game, we had to ice the idea because the rink was too far.
  5. A baker hockey player poorly played an opposition forward when he iced the puck.
  6. Texan magicians and hockey players have one thing in common. They both make Texas hat tricks.
  7. Carpenters hate playing the shinney the most. They don't like being nailed on the boards.
  8. When a jock is punished for a crime. It is a unique form of just-ice
  9. When the ice hockey player was awarded a penalty after continuous icings, he went to take the penalty but took time to thaw it out!
  10. Where do coaches do their paperwork? The off-ice.
  11. Rinks are one of the coolest places in the world because of the ice and many fans.
  12. Stan Lee was an exceptional goalie, which is justified by seeing his name. It has the Stanley Cup!
  13. The other day, a boy climbed up a maple tree with a shinney stick because he wanted to join the Toronto Maple Leafs.
  14. Canadians have always beaten Germans in hurley. Germans bring their wurst game, while Canadians bring their "eh" game.
  15. Players are good at making friends because they are quick to break the ice.
Hockey pun captions
Jordan Eberle of the Seattle Kraken skates with the puck before a game against the Edmonton Oilers at Climate Pledge Arena in December 2022 in Seattle, Washington. Photo by Christopher Mast/NHLI.
Source: Getty Images

Short hockey puns

It is not enough to be a fan. Spice up your social media captions and hurley-related conversations with hilarious one-liners. What are the wittiest hockey puns for Instagram? Here are ten short ice and field hockey puns for captions and the most entertaining conversations.

  1. Covid-19 quarantine for hurley players is referred to as ice-olation.
  2. Shinney rappers are called Tupuc.
  3. Just-ice is the shinney version of justice.
  4. The Lady Bling Trophy is the most bejewelled trophy in the world.
  5. Nice hockey is the less violent version of ice hockey.
  6. Ho-ho-hockey is the only sport played by Santa and the Christmas elves.
  7. Icing makes the hurley the sweetest sport in the world.
  8. Nothing can be done when the player's wife Mrs the net.
  9. Hurley hero Mario Lemieux had a nose for the puck. That is why he is called Mario the Magsniffascent.
  10. Zombieonis are the best means zombie players can use to get around.
What are some funny hockey sayings?
Netherlands' Freeke Moes handles the ball during a test match against Ireland at Sportpark Kees Boekelaan in November 2022 in Bilthoven, Netherlands. Photo by Rene Nijhuis/BSR Agency.
Source: Getty Images

Additional hockey game jokes

  1. Why is the rink hot after each game? All the fans have left.
  2. Why did the coach kick Cinderella off the team? Because she ran away from the ball.
  3. When is an ice hockey player similar to a judge? When he sits on the bench.
  4. Did you know about the player who quit playing to become an accountant? She wanted an off-ice job.
  5. When hawks play, it is called Hawkey.
  6. Where does the majority of a jock's salary come from? The tooth fairy.
  7. Why is Jesus such a good goalie? Because Jesus saves.
  8. Why do many players become surgeons? They have specialized in bury-hat-trick surgery.

Hockey puns are the icing on the puck for all shinney lovers. In addition to its health benefits, humour among players and fans spices up social interaction and increases personal satisfaction for participants.

READ ALSO: Ranking the top 20 hottest hockey players in the world right now

Sportsbrief recently published a comprehensive report rating the most attractive male and female jocks of 2022. From fan favourites like Darcy Kuemper to hockey's famous Captain America, Joe Pavelski read about the hottest shinney players at the top of their game.

Click on the link above to explore more about the most beautiful female ice hockey players in the NHL in 2022.

Ciku Njuguna photo
Ciku Njuguna
Ciku Njuguna is a journalist with 3 year’s experience in content creation based in Kenya. She currently covers sports personnel as well as team biographies.